Tonight I had a scheduled workout followed by “Fast Track” at the gym…knowing this I still this morning I got out of bed completed 1.74 miles in the cold and then did an hour lunchtime yoga class.
As the day progressed, something in the pit of my soul told me that I had enough and needed to rest; but still I came home from work, changed out of my work clothes, walked the dog and then headed to the gym to complete my weekly routine ignoring the intuition that was talking to me so strongly.
The nagging thoughts continued in my head…I need to push, I need to lose weight faster, I need to get stronger.
When In fact, what my hurting body and strong intuition was telling me was – I needed to rest.
I needed to sit and take time for me.
I started my workout and completed 50 rows with the bar and moved with hesitation to the tire flip where I felt tears swell in the back of my eyes as I bent over; I felt a nasty twinge in my low back and my knees were screaming at me. I placed my fingers on the tire and I couldn’t lift it.
I felt anger and frustration and disappointment.
I walked away and moved to the wall sits. Again my knees told me that I wasn’t going to be able stay there long and my back again spasmed and wouldn’t let me flatten it against the wall. And then the tears started streaming from my face. I had to give up!!!
After a few moments of tears and some feedback from the trainer, I washed my face and left the gym.
I went straight to the river to sit, to ponder, to listen to the ducks, to hear the raindrops dance on the roof of my car, to watch the city lights dance across the water, and feel the beautiful moon that is hiding in the clouds shedding it’s blessings down upon me.
I closed my eyes began to breathe and sat!
I realized that today I had over 10,000 steps the equivalent to 4 miles, 119 minutes of excercise, and 1002 calories burned.
The message the came to me was this – There comes a time when I need to walk away, to sit and rest. In order to realize my dreams and desires – it’s OK to say NO. It’s OK to stop and REST. It is NEEDED! There is no need to be frustrated or guilty or angry.
I give myself permission to take the time to rest – because by doing so -tomorrow I will be stronger!
I AM ENOUGH ❤️
Adele Josephine 